RP: Letters, Part 3

This is a continuation of the second part of the Letters series.

I shall be honest and warn you from the outset that I am feeling depressed tonight. I would rather write to you when I have calmed myself somewhat to lessen the chance of taking my emotions out on you, but I am afraid everything will be jumbled up in my head when I awaken. Bear with me--I highly doubt this will be my best letter to you. Since the humans have come I have been overwhelmed, which I am sure has been obvious to you, but this is the first time an encounter with one of their kind has left me so upset. Please do not worry, because it is nothing they did that caused this. So far I have been met with only kindness from their kind, and I hope I have made that clear enough to you at this point for you to trust them, as well.

I was walking in the Temple Gardens today, attempting to find Manari, when I was stopped by a different human in the garb of the Scarlet March. He was dark-haired, bearded, and had honest eyes. His name, I believe, was Utherall. I assumed that he was looking for his brethren, so I asked him if he needed help finding where they were staying in the city. To my dismay, I learned he had come to Darnassus under his own power, and had no idea there were other members of the March here. Even worse, he was under the impression Manari was dead. This was not the way I would have liked to learn just how recently their group had undergone its upheaval. I assumed it was several years ago, but based on today's events I now believe the worst occured months ago, and they are not quite finished with their reformation. Was it you who was always telling me to assume nothing? I can't quite remember.

I can only imagine what a shock it must have been to receive such powerful news of his own order from a complete stranger, and a Night Elf no less! He kept his composure well, and asked me very politely what they had wished me to tell them, how long they planned to stay, and if I knew where they were going next. I answered as best I could without being too open. I was unsure of how much detail I should give since he was not in contact with the other members of the March. At the end of our conversation he took his leave and relocated to a nearby tree...to pray, I believe. It was then that I fully realized how much this news had upset him.

I decided that the best way to resolve this would be to find Manari as quickly as possible and inform her of his presence. I smelled her out and located where she was resting within the Temple. I fear she was deep in reverie when I approached her, but she instantly gave me her full attention when she learned of Utherall's presence. She thanked me for my reserve, telling me she would have done the same in my position, but reassured me that he was indeed one of their members. I am quite relieved to hear that, in all honesty. It gives me hope that their ways will prove to be not too different from my own.

I told her where to find him, and then quickly relayed the news that I would be allowed to leave with them. She told me she was surprised I had gotten permission, and I reminded her of Fandral Staghelm's temperment. I may have glossed over the part about his opinion of me, but can you find fault with me for that? She seemed ready to pick up and leave that very moment, but I saw a trace of sadness in her eyes, and talked her into remaining a few days more on the pretext that Lady Rastel would surely enjoy seeing more of the city. Something important to her happened here, and I cannot understand why she would not give herself a few days to give in to her memories without some encouragement. Is it really that hard for her to let go?

You've probably guessed that I have some selfish motivations in encouraging her to stay, and you are right. Of course I am not ready to leave here. This place has memories for me, as well, and I do not know how much time will pass before I am free to walk among them again. Pieces of you are scattered about, and part of me fears they will be forgotten the instant I leave the boundaries of the city. I also need to make sure the Nighttalon home is provided for, since I am technically all that's left of the line.

There is also a practical side to my hesitation. The humans keep calling me by titles I do not understand, and it is becoming more and more clear that I know less Common than I thought. I want to make sure I fully comprehend the basics of polite social interaction while with those who sought me out before I venture among the less wordly of their kin. And, of course, I am scared out of my wits. You've been waiting for me to admit to that all this time, I am sure. I have never in my life done anything alone, and right now I feel very lonely, indeed. Even when I was alone in the wilderness during my training, the spirits were with me. It is hard to feel alone when your mind is filled with a timeless swath of someone else's memories and abilities. As a result, I am completely unprepared for what lies ahead. Again, I wish I knew what thoughts crossed your mind when you boarded that ship. Did you look back? For my sake at least, I hope so.

That man's face when he learned Manari was within the city...it plagues my mind. In that instant, I could relate to him perfectly. The minute you stopped replying to my letters part of me became convinced you were lost to me forever. I am no longer ashamed to admit it, even within these letters addressed to you. Was I shown today how I will feel when I learn once and for all what has become of you?

Because of you I wanted to help him, but there is nothing a stranger can do. I could only freely give him my leave when he asked and hope the tranquility of Darnassus provided some reassurance. I hope his faith has given him the strength he needs to adjust to the scope of this news. Bringing someone back from the dead is no small task, and I do not envy him the next few days.

Elune'adare. Perhaps tomorrow will bring me a lighter mood.